I used to dream of the day I would have time to myself, the kids would be all safely delivered to their various schools. I'd do all those unfinished projects, uninterrupted by someone with a lego shoved up their nose or actually clean up the house and have it stay that way until about 3:05. The reality of that day is nothing like I imagined it.
I find myself walking around all sad the day before and then when the morning whirlwind begins and I jump to the pre school business of drill sergeant ( HAIR? check, TEETH? check, do you have your books,your pencil case, tissues, lunch, duct tape, well you never know) all whilst making crepes and getting some pictures taken. Then we drive off in plenty of time, only to realize that, several hundred other people, will be driving the same street, for the same drop off time.
I deliver first, big boy to his very first day at a brand new junior high.
Then park, to walk in my baby, her request, to her very first day of a new school.
We head in to her classroom and find it still. In this school the kids all gather in the gym and line up. The teacher comes down to collect them.
So I have to leave her there with a hug, which was my request, knowing she doesn't know another sole, and this will be the hardest school year yet for her.
I try to keep it together as I walk back to my car.
My heart hurts.